April 7, 2006

Crimes connected to MySpace have parents, police on guard

By Julie Davis Berry
Executive Editor

With networking Web sites like MySpace and Xanga becoming an increasingly popular communication tool for middle and high school students—and pedophiles—parents and the police are desperately trying to find a way to help kids protect themselves while using these sites.

Recent news reports of abductions, rapes and even murders attributed to the online networking sites are becoming more common, especially related to MySpace, a site created only two years ago.

In January a 14-year-old Livermore girl was found dead in a ditch in the Central Valley after a rumored meeting with someone she met on MySpace. That murder case has yet to be solved. In February in Santa Cruz, a 26-year-old man was arrested for the rape of a 14-year-old girl he met through MySpace.

The latest news is that a 35-year-old part-time Westmont High School math teacher was arrested Feb. 20 after planning to meet a 12-year-old girl that he met online allegedly for a sexual liason. Luke Lajoie, a San Jose resident, was arrested when the 12-year-old turned out to be a Campbell police officer.

According to Campbell Police Detective Gary Berg, this was the third arrest in four weeks in Campbell of adult men arranging to meet juveniles they met online for sexual trysts.

There are, however, things kids can do to protect themselves, without disconnecting their Internet connections, he says.

“I highly recommend that teenagers don’t go into chat rooms with unknown people,” said Berg. “If you are approached by an unknown person, don’t continue the conversation and report anything inappropriate to the online service. Never give out any personal information about yourself, like your name, address, school, sports teams or extracurricular activities. And, we are really advocating that parents know what’s going on with their kids online activities.”

Parents set limits
Some parents insist that kids only access computers in a common room like a family room. Others maintain their own sites so that they can easily go onto their kids’ sites whenever they want.

Westmont High School parent Debra Martinez says she can appreciate the benefit of the sites. “I like that the shy boy or girl can let someone know they are there instead of being drowned out by the thundering herd that is high school. I absolutely would have had my own site as a teen.”

Martinez also found it helpful recently when her 16-year-old son ended up in the hospital. “His brother got on MySpace and before we knew it everyone knew what had happened. It saved a lot of phone calls.”

However she and her husband Carlos set strict limits for their two teenage sons. “They are not allowed in chat rooms, and I think they choose to stay out of them in general, except for the small “known” groups they form in texting. They have been told that we will look at their My Space page occasionally, so they better not have anything they’d be upset at having us look at on there.” She goes on to say that “if it’s in our house, we have the right/duty to know about it.”
Del Mar parent Melody Floyd agrees. “I know my 15-year-old son‘s password and check his MySpace account on a somewhat regular basis. He knows that nothing he does on the computer is private (including his e-mail account). I also look at the MySpace accounts of his “friends.” He has photos on but no personal information about what school he goes to. He’s supposed to only talk to people he knows. He generally doesn’t spend too much time on it. But when he does, it can easily get out of hand.”

However, Floyd does not allow her 12-year-old daughter to use MySpace. 

Westmont parent Mariann Talley has decided not to allow her three children to have MySpace accounts until better security measures are in place. “I’ve looked at MySpace and didn’t think it was appropriate for my children. I’ve heard stories of girls getting involved with older men through MySpace. The whole thing sounded very unhealthy.”

Tips for teens and parents regarding MySpace Safety
While MySpace may be a boon to communication for teenagers it can also leave them open to communication with pedophiles. But it looks like it is here to stay so what can a parent and their teenager do to protect themselves? It is essential to follow safety rules when using these sites. Police and Internet aficionados agree that the following tips can help:

- Don’t use any personal information on your profile, including your real first name. Create a nickname that is used specifically for MYSPACE.

- Don’t get too personal in your blog. Don’t list your school, address, sports teams, etc. Be especially careful not to write about places you are going to be.

- Set your profile to no mail. This way you can’t receive mail from strangers, but will still be able to communicate with your friends via bulletins and comments.

- Only add people that you know to your friends list. If you like visiting band profiles add those profiles to your favorites. You can add a profile as a favorite without having the person as a friend.

- Don’t add your picture to your profile. Use a graphic or an avatar instead of a personal photo.

- Monitor your profile often. Check for unfamiliar friends and content that is inappropriate.

- Don’t use sexual slang on your profile. Names such as “Laffy Taffy Girl, Back Dat Azz Up, Rodeo Girl, N Luv Wit A Stripper and Whisper Girl,” are just a few examples of variations of song titles used as profile names, which may have sexual connotations.

- Never meet someone from MySpace unless your parent is present. This holds true whether you are meeting someone from the same sex or not, you must be careful.

- Talk with your parents about anything that happens online that makes you uncomfortable. Contact the Web site to complain if you (or your child) finds something inappropriate on a private site.